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Sunday, June 21, 2009 @ Sunday, June 21, 2009
PLC
Yep, This will be the place where i will reside and train in for the next 8 weeks. Also, known as Pasir Laba Camp, it's the training ground for all SISPEC cadets to be trained for BSLC.
(In case the following words may seem foreign and alien to you, let's just say that I'm now entering the next phase of army life: training to be a sergeant) Yep, i did not actually want to blog today, but was inclined to do so, for my blog would remain like some locked-up, dust-ridden journal if i continued to let in lay in its ruin. Haiz, the one-week block leave had been a welcome relief from weeks of boring and tiresome training, but somehow the one week of flu and fever had all but ruined most of the block leave. Still, it wasn't such a bad break, as my cousins did visit me before i was unwell, and i managed to squeeze in 2 outings in the past 2 days. Friday was spent eating buffet at Sakura and watching "The Taking of Pelham 123" with Han Liang, while i watched another movie, "I Love You, Man", with my Leo group yesterday. These outings just serve to remind me that freedom is so restrictive yet seductive, and i often yearn for more of these breaks at the end of each day. Well, pardon my english, for 7 months of not touching my books has caused such a drop in my writing standard. Guess i got to hit the books soon, and i guess i'll have lots of free time for the next few weeks. I heard that training at PLC is tough, but the breaks are long, well-deserved and maybe a little bit boring. So, i really hope these 2 years can pass by quickly... let's just say 1 year and 8 and a half months left. "Here we go again, same old shit again..." The night beckons, for me to sleep. Labels: PLC |
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Monday, April 13, 2009 @ Monday, April 13, 2009
Gone
Yep, that's the title for this post, a post which has been long postponed. A day that I've waited so long, yet with a sense of forborne and fear. I really wanted to post this not because i wanted to update this blog, but rather, this day has held a special meaning to my life: another transition, another crossroad....
Here i am right now, sitting in front of the white screen, my head glistening from beads of sweat and the lack of hair (that's right, I'm botak!) and fingers typing furiously as fatigue begins to crawl into my mind. For the past few days, I've been slowly but surely packing my bag with full of necessary inventory required for the 9 week BMT. From clothes to basic necessities to more clothes, my trusty red bad just sags at the mention of these items. To think that i will recieve much more when i enter tomorrow... The place may be located just a few miles offshore at the east of singapore, but boy, it seems like I'm about to travel to some god-foresaken area far, far away from home, and exposed to the harsh reality of military training. With rigourous training and lack of luxuries within reach, what lies ahead of me may seemed like a nightmare that is waiting for me to be in. The star actor of the show.... Oh boy, how anxious am i, I really cant wait for the transformation of the outcome. 2 weeks ... it really seems endless huh? Well, all these talk and no action, but i guess i'll be facing lots of action in the coming 2 weeks...wait make it 9 weeks... or u can even say 2 years. Well, depending on how you see it, it can seem either like a blessing or a curse. Deep in my heart, i just want to breeze through it all without any troubles or worries, but hey, who says life deals you an easy hand all the time. Of course, with IPPT and the horrors of endless training, i can expect all this to be a huge load in my mind. Well... we shall see... I dunno how long I'll be out of action, but if you are seeing this, u sure won't have to wait as long as the last time! Thus i shall end my post on a note: "Sometimes you don't have to find the road, the road finds you! 5 months since the end of A levels, 2 years to the end of army! ^^ Labels: Gone |
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Monday, March 2, 2009 @ Monday, March 02, 2009
Trepidation
Well well well, what do you know? After 3 months of absence, I've decided to make a revival of my blogging lifestyle. I guess nobody really missed me, judging by the tagbox. Haha. But anyway, my main purpose for this entry is not only for the sake of updating, but rather, a brief outlook of my lfe currently and what future's in store for me.
Sad to say, the past 3 months had been rather monotonous, as i was either doing household chores, exercising, or spending some quality time with my family. With each passing day, i know how little free time i left, so rather than brooding over boredom or uneasiness, i might as well vent it all out on my blog. Well, i can say that the number of days that i really went out to socialise can virtually be counted with my 2 hands (quite pathetic huh?) Still, i did not exactly regret how i spent my time, though deep down in my heart, i really wished i was working or mixing around with my buddies. I know it seems pretty lame to be drowning myself in one's own sorrow, but for the sake of veting my pent-up emotions, i'll just go on blabbering. Ever since i attended the NTU talk last month, my heart and mind has been feeling relatively uneasy. I knew that i had tried my very best, and that no amount of anticpation is going to change the outcome. ...Anyway, just a random note: The original titleof this entry was "crossroads", but i decided to change it to "trepidation". Don't ask me why, i just felt like doing so... Back to reality. As i was saying, my A level results are currently weighing pretty heavily on my mind. Each time i try to conjure so formula on my total score, or anticipate the final grades, my head start to tremble, and i will close my eys shut for a while. This uneasy feeling hasn't seem to abate in recent days, and only seems to grow steadily in strength. Even now as i'm writing on, my fingers grow cold at the thought of the outcome. 4 days! Even the O level collection day does not seem to match this in terms of anxiety and stress level. Even though my friends have told me to chill, and wished me the best, i just don't feel so sure about myself. For the first time in my life, i actually dread the very day. This sense of worry seems to heighten further, hours after i was reflecting the cycling trip i had with cheng ying and chia how. The question posed by CY was simple yet definitive: "What are your plans should u ... not do well... " Even with all the confidence i mustered in answering that question, deep down i knew that bravado was gonna fade somehow. My answer? "We'll see by then, we'll see..." Its amazing how I, together with the hundreds of thousands of other students. await this very day with such patience and endurance. The big test may be over, but the bigger outcome awaits... Scolarships, application, courses...how all these seem so easily said, yet, it could only be possible with excellent grades. How life will be such a maddening rush as soon as my hands grasp the oh-so-important slip of paper... How my destiny will change upon receving this very slip.... How am i going to fare? Oh god, i really want yet fear to know.... I don't know why, but all the words that i wanted to relate in this blog seems to vanish as soon as i think of this. Man, I've got to get a grip! But this feeling just doesn't seem to go away. I will write more as soon as my head clears. Maybe i'll feel better to explain that 3 months of absence. Then again, maybe not. Anyway, for those awaiting the results too, i wish you all the best! Don't fear like me, or you will feel worse off. Haiz, how i seem to effortlessly encourage people, but fail miserably in doing so to myself. A level collection, University Open house, training, then NS... What a life! Till then... Labels: trepidation |
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